Where Should It Go?

My focus, I mean.

Do I tell myself to keep my head in the books and my heart on a short leash?

Or do I let myself live with some sort of reckless abandon for whatever experiences may come my way?

I didn't mean to end things with N to find things with someone else.

So what does it mean if I'm developing a serious crush?

What does it mean if I don't know what I want...only what I never want to feel again?

What does it mean if I get distracted from the goals I should be pursuing in the search for my bigger and better happy?

Is there enough to go around?

If not, where should it go?